So there is this very creatively done birth announcement created by some uber-nerd soon-to-be daddy. If you haven’t seen it, here you go:

Well done, yes? I think so too, but as I continued to think about it, troubling things began to brew inside of me, somewhere in the brain area, I think. To better understand my concerns, I thought I would break down what seems to be happening here, metaphorically speaking:

The scene used is the classic climax to Star Wars, where Luke Skywalker used the force to blow up the Death Star while his friends save his ass.

Luke Skywalker flies by representing AGING COUPLE. Awesome, I get this, he’s the hero. I’m with you.

But wait! They are followed a second later by the enemy, Darth Vader and Co. representing LAWS OF NATURE

This is fairly deep so far. The aging couple is literally and metaphorically running out of time, pursued by the laws of nature. But wait, what’s this?


Um, ok, yeah, it will take some kick-ass sperm to save the day on this one, for sure. Am I reading too much into this in thinking it’s no accident that “KICK-ASS SPERM” is represented by Han(d) Solo? I mean, the sperm is allied with the AGING COUPLE, but is not part of them. Does this mean it wasn’t the aging man’s sperm? No judgment here, people who want babies can get them in many viable ways, I just think the connection seems to be someone outside the couple used his “solo hand” to deliver some “kick-ass sperm” to “aging couple”

Either I am crazy, or this is getting deeper than the subject matter would imply.

Anyways, K.A.S. blasts LAWS OF NATURE to kingdom come, paving the way for Aging Couple to use the force to propel, presumably, you know, sperm, into the Death Star, here representing uh…

Now, this is one of those instances where the thing that you want to avoid saying is waaaay less creepy than what you actually said. BABY HOLE? Really? I mean, I know the wife probably would not have wanted you to put VAGINA there, but… I mean, maybe you could have just gone with… nothing? I think at this point the readers understand the metaphorical significance contained in this act.

The oversensitive jerk in me is a bit repulsed at how, thus far, the male can associate himself with KICK-ASS SPERM in this scene, but the mom just gets BABY HOLE. It seems a little out of proportion, but JUST WAIT IT GETS BETTER. As our heroes fly away from the Death Star, which I think we can reasonably infer is the “womb” in this metaphor, this happens:

Did you get that? THE METAPHORICAL WOMB EXPLODES revealing two children. The AGING COUPLE and the KICK-ASS SPERM joined forces to blow up the “womb” in order to get two kids. That is, as long as you have been following my logic up to this point.

To wrap up the scene, KICK-ASS SPERM congratulates AGING COUPLE on a job well done, and Obi Wan Kenobi, representing absolutely nothing, (because hey, he’s freaking Obi Wan Kenobi) tells AGING COUPLE “the force will be with them, always.”

This video is pretty amazing. I’m sure the wife had to sign off on it as being okay to post, but holy hell, this is the nerd equivalent of a touch down dance that gives pretty much all the credit to the dad for making this baby thing happen. A congratulations is in order to the expecting couple though, I can’t wait to see the sequel, THE DELIVERY STRIKES BACK.